Comments on: Do You Screen Your Advisors Before You Listen To Their Advice? http://adultaddstrengths.com/2007/05/23/do-you-screen-your-advisors-before-you-listen-to-their-advice/ A Blog about Adults with Attention Surplus Condition (aka ADHD) by Adult ADHD Coach Pete Quily Fri, 10 Feb 2012 10:15:55 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Amy http://adultaddstrengths.com/2007/05/23/do-you-screen-your-advisors-before-you-listen-to-their-advice/comment-page-1/#comment-285521 Amy Wed, 30 May 2007 17:06:21 +0000 http://adultaddstrengths.com/2007/05/23/do-you-screen-your-advisors-before-you-listen-to-their-advice/#comment-285521 It is a rare person I find who I can trust to tell me what they think, straight out. Why I married my husband, a quality in my best frined. One problem here, however. I don't seem to immediatly detect the other trait that makes the firat a very, very destructive...the need to use these comments to tear others down, or build them up, not based on their acutal views of things, but based on what best serves them at the time. Unfortunatly also aplies to the 2 above. One of my favorite people in the world is my sister-in-law (coincidentally, the wife of my brother, the only one of three also w/ A.D.D.) who will tell me "What did you do to your hair??" when I know I really messed it up w/ a do-it-yourself dye job, but when she tells me it looks good the next time I see her, I can actually believe her. It's the genuine-ness that makes the difference for me. (And that I admire or think well of them in whatever sense so that I value their opions and feedback helps also.) Encouraging me is what I value more than being 'brought back to reality', though not holding back honest constructive criticism which I enjoy because I feel that I'm taken seriously, as most of my life I was put down just to be put down, or didn't measure up to some vague image of what someone though I should be. Rambling is an A.D.D. trait also, isn't it? It is a rare person I find who I can trust to tell me what they think, straight out. Why I married my husband, a quality in my best frined. One problem here, however. I don’t seem to immediatly detect the other trait that makes the firat a very, very destructive…the need to use these comments to tear others down, or build them up, not based on their acutal views of things, but based on what best serves them at the time. Unfortunatly also aplies to the 2 above.

One of my favorite people in the world is my sister-in-law (coincidentally, the wife of my brother, the only one of three also w/ A.D.D.) who will tell me “What did you do to your hair??” when I know I really messed it up w/ a do-it-yourself dye job, but when she tells me it looks good the next time I see her, I can actually believe her. It’s the genuine-ness that makes the difference for me. (And that I admire or think well of them in whatever sense so that I value their opions and feedback helps also.) Encouraging me is what I value more than being ‘brought back to reality’, though not holding back honest constructive criticism which I enjoy because I feel that I’m taken seriously, as most of my life I was put down just to be put down, or didn’t measure up to some vague image of what someone though I should be. Rambling is an A.D.D. trait also, isn’t it?

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