ADHD Is A Devastating Hidden Disability That Non Adders Don’t Seem To Want To Hear About, Don’t Dare To Try To Understand 2


#13. This post is a part of a series where people answer my anonymous survey question. If you have ADHD but haven’t gone public with it, what would it take to you go public with ADHD?

If you have ADHD but haven’t gone public with it, what would it take to you go public with ADHD?shareasimage

There are risks and rewards for going public with ADHD AND for staying hidden in the ADHD closet. See this post for context on the series.

“It would only take figuring out how and where and when.

ADHD is a devastating hidden disability that non ADDers don’t seem to want to hear about, don’t dare to try to understand. Maybe, even understandably, can’t.

The very concept of ADHD seems to shatter non ADDers fixed, unwavering, and unflappable core belief system that: behavior is completely volitional, and that any deviation is punishable. End of subject.

ADD life is painful and destructive, even when understood. What other disability compares?…when you consider not just the personal disappointments and heartbreaks, the disappointments reflected back by those affected, the lack of understanding and support. But More: actual distain for our mistakes and foibles? Despite our best efforts.

When trying to explain it throws fuel on the fire? When even the medication is looked at askance, and in itself suspect to the detractors?

A non ADDer cannot or will not conceive of the unfortunate reality of the disconnect between effort and accomplishment, the Sisyphean effort of pushing that boulder up hill every day.

Can’t try any harder. Already trying harder than any 6 people collectively. ADD is relentless. It takes no breaks. It is a sentence. Punishable.”


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2 thoughts on “ADHD Is A Devastating Hidden Disability That Non Adders Don’t Seem To Want To Hear About, Don’t Dare To Try To Understand

  • Kari Hayes

    I recently diagnosed myself with ADD-not ADHD. All my life I have suffered from this. I almost wish I had a terminal diagnosis or perhaps a brain tumor. I already felt worthless and have for a long time. You are right that it is excruciatingly hard to:
    find a doctor
    get the right medication
    forgive yourself – let alone expect family and friends to understand.

    Hard it to feel hopeless. ..

  • Pete Quily Post author

    Hi Kari, it’s crucial for you to get a diagnosis from someone who knows adhd,and many don’t vs a self diagnosis. It can be difficult to find a proper diagnosis, the right meds and treatment but it’s worth the look. ADHD is a very treatable condition. over time, some family and friend can understand if you find ways of explaining it and those who won’t limit your time with them. Life’s too short.