Part of #ExplainAdultADHD. A campaign to reduce the ignorance, misinformation, and stigma against adults with ADHD.
You’re Not ADHD If You Are Having A Rough Day. Live In My Head For At Least 30 Seconds.
When I try to explain that I’m living with ADHD, some people tell me, “We’re all ADHD”. It makes my stomach turn. I want to tell them, “Live in my head for at least 30 seconds, you’ll be begging for mercy”.
People that I have dated in the past, couldn’t handle me. Others have shot down my self-esteem. I lost my career in the Navy, after receiving a diagnosis.
Coworkers would get irritated with me if I didn’t completely understand the directions. I easily forget what I was doing.
The point is that don’t tell me that “We’re all ADHD”, just because you are having a busy day or misplaced your stapler.
It’s a 24/7 hell in my head. It is the real deal and I have struggled in school.
It’s not a joke to be laughed at, when I try to explain myself. It hurts when people get mad at me.
I’m not going to let my ADHD define me, my life can get better.
By Nina.
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ADHD is many things, many ages, many genders, many generations. ADHD is like road construction- there’s disruption, and it’s always unique. There’s always more going on than usual. The ADD’er can envision at least 5 ways around the construction at any one time, too, whereas many people take their time to find one way. The thing is, there doesn’t have to be any external road construction for there to be a maze of interruptions going on in my head. So what if I’m creating something brand new or philosophizing about very real and important things, let alone trying to solve real problems that real people have? Nobody cares, they just want to stay in their lane . (Ay! Don’t we get told to stay in our lane, all of us!) People do benefit from something like normal and typical. We humans are about 40-90% automatic in thought and behavior. ADD’ers interrupt the flow all the time. So if I challenge you with something unexpected for a few moments out of your day, or even several moments over several hours, imagine what it is to be like me with seldom a solid road map? And then, you wonder how I do a puzzle or read a book for 6 hours solid. Well, once you get in the groove, stay in that lane, it’s really hard sometimes to get out. Can you see why that would be? And if I solve a problem you didn’t know you had in those 6 hours, I’m not being a pessimist, I’m being too smart for school. Don’t bash my nerdiness, just be glad you can make some use of me! That’s apparently what firms always did with those crazy marketing types, like on some old TV show with those two good-looking young guys… And if I can’t word retrieve, you get my point. Need the name? You honestly can Google it. Just go with it, eh? Everybody hits a little traffic sometimes.